Yesterday my husband threw his keys at me, hitting me in the head. And, it hurt!! He didn't mean for them to hit me; he thought I could catch them. I wasn't prepared for them to be thrown, so I did NOT catch them. But, what really hurt was the uncaring way HE reacted to the whole thing; the lack of concern
that followed and turning the situation around to be MY fault. The whole incident lasted only about 5 minutes and wasn't really all that drastic. But, I will remember it - how he reacted and how I felt - while my husband probably had forgotten within a few minutes.
When our daughter celebrated her 16th birthday, we had a really big party for her at our house. What a celebration!! The decorations, the party, the house full of her friends and family!! Our daughter tried ALL day to get her father to wish her a "Happy Birthday"; but, even with all of the excitement going on around him, he never did acknowledge her special day.
For the “how many-th” time, I told my husband that I would be able to pick our oldest daughter up from work. For the “how many-th” time, he asked how was she going to get home and what time did she get off. How can I continue to be patient and understanding, and actually sound patient and understanding?
Why is it so hard for a person to acknowledge the important things - the love and consideration and respect for others in the same household? Why does he act so mean and thoughtless? Why can't he remember even the simple requests? Why does he act so confused? And, why does he do so many off things? Who is this stranger, anyway?!
The above incidents happened many years ago; and as the years have gone by, the situation has gotten gradually worse. It was always unclear to me if my husband just had that kind of a personality; or if there was something else wrong.
As I begin this challenge - to post about this topic for 31 days of October 2014 - I hope to be able to share my journey with others. I am by no means an expert on the subject of Dementia; but I want to share my experiences and my feelings with others who may have similar experiences. As I share, I hope to at least let others know they are not alone in dealing with Dementia; therefore, my month-long blogs are called "31 Days of Dementia's Demands". Hope what I am sharing is helpful in some way.